To Have and to Hold
By Keiti | August 30, 2007
I was thinking today about how disposable of a world we live in. Everything has become frantic and pretty damn-well meaningless in the sense that if we don’t like something we can just throw it away and get something better. It doesn’t matter what the something is. It could be a computer or a car or anything material.
But
I also thought about how relationships are like that, too. It’s so easy to hit a rough patch and instead of working on what needs to be fixed we throw the former object of our desire away and find someone new. Only to rinse, lather, and repeat.
My parents just had their 40th Anniversary about two weeks ago. 40 years! And while I have never once heard my parents so much as raise their voice to each other, I know (from my “adult” perspective) that they’ve had disagreements. It certainly can’t have been easy with my father being gone so much when my brother and I were young. Both my parents must have had their bouts of loneliness and insecurities, but instead of throwing the other away for a new model, they persevered and sacrificed the now for the future.
As for myself, I am just as guilty as the next person of throwing things away in search of the next new thing. But in my last relationship, I did have periods where I wondered whether it was worth it to stick it out - and I worked through the now because I was focused on the future. Obviously, that did me no good considering where things ended up, but I’m more optimistic now about what future relationships hold for me. I know that I don’t have to settle for less than what I want and need in a relationship and I know that I’m capable of putting my selfish now feelings aside for the sake of longevity.
It’s just a shame that it’s taken me until the age of 36 to understand this.
But I guess it’s better late than never, right?
Topics: Dating, Life in General |